Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Lololol

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why did the kid with no legs get eaten by wolves? he couldn't get away

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

One time i was in north philly and bought milk, then i came home and drank it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walks into a bar He goes to drink away the fact that alcoholism is tearing his family apart and that he lost custody of his three-year-old son that same day

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Covert trance, black Ops, and something I kinda made up myself. The first two are basically using suggestions without the victim being aware of it, that is how that famous bank robber that just asks nicely for all the cash and gets it succeeds. The other is tricking the "allmighty" subconcious and again, my own invention people claim its called "this and that", I know, because I coined most of the terms. Anyway, you put people into a deep state of trance, you tell them to take a step forward into the sea, and well, you actually led them down the top of a skyscraper or something fun... "Now... Suck on the lollipop I have between my, okay ill stop"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why bouriquet laugh ? cause hes mom get hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

DAVID.B YOU O ES 2 BAR YA TRAMP

thumb_up thumb_down -15

One day a black man went and bought a car with his own hard-earned money.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's the difference between a baby and hot dog? I don't put ketchup on my hot dog when I eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the blonde fall down the stairs? Somebody tripped her.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Kid 1: Mama why is my name Daisy? Mama: Because when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head! Kid 2: Mama why is my name Rose? Mama: Becuase it was a nice name.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do men like most of all? Let's not lie, BOOBIES!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Alister Darling plucks his eyebrows.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is the best joke ever? 1D

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the boy fart on his sister? Because he was sitting on her, and happened to pass gas.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's green and fuzy and could kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than Nickelback? Nothing. -Win G.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops