Q. What's large, solid, and full of veins? A. A man or woman who frequently engages in weightlifting and follows a diet primarily based around high protein and low carbohydrate intake

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

In Soviet Russia its very cold

minorities

What did the gay man say to the other gay man? “How was your day?“

Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride in a poop poop fart turd fart, dildo

What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fsh

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

What did one pole say to the other pole? We are both from poland

What do you call a black guy with a shotgun? A fine American citizen exercising his 2nd Amendment right.

i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Roses are read bacon is good poems are hard .........BACON

Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

Q)whats pink and fluffy A)pink fluff

Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Cancer.

Knock knock

Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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