Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

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what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

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What do two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

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Q: What's gray and comes in gallons? A: Gray paint.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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How did Jimmy know that his neighbor was a serial killer? He didn't... Jimmy's dead now

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

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Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

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A man walks into a bar,gets a drink, and then leaves.

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Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

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What do humans and trees have in common? -If you hit them with an ax multiple times, they fal down

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David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

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Why does pavement get hot. Because it’s black. How could you tell she had bruises. Because they were black. Why did the boy drop out of school. Because he was dying of melanoma.

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what is the difference between Rick Perry and Lindsay Lohan? it only takes Lindsay 4 1/2 hours to finish a sentance.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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What's black and sits at the top of the stair case? Stephen hawking in a house fire.......

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Why don't men have menstruation? -Because it sucks

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I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to touch the goats beard

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Roses are red, violets are blue.. Oh i can't finish joke coz i gotta go poo ! :/

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops