Me: Mike Mike: Yeah Me: The more you breath the more pissed off im getting.

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What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A: The live one at the bottom trying to eat his way out. Q: What's worse than that? A: When he comes back for more.

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roses are red violets are blue they are pretty and you are not

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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there was a black man n a white man they went into a hauted house the black man saw a penut butter slice n tryed to eat it then the ghost said dont eat the penut butter slice so the black man ran away so then the white man came and saw the penut butter slice the white man toke a bite then the ghots said i told u once i told you 2 i wipe my ass with that penut butter slice

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Wanna hear something dirty? Mud.

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What's the difference between a jew and pizza? A Jew is human and pizza is food.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because the farmer is obviously to stupid to build a proper chicken coop, and thus his chicken is crossing the road and will most likely be hit by a car

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What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? A long sleeve shirt

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? feel the other side of the worm in his mouth

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: Because his mother just got raped.

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Q. How do you punish Helen Keller? A. Rearrange the furniture in her room

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what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So it could cause traffic accidents.

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What do you call a deer with only one leg? A one legged deer. What do you call a deer with one leg, one eye and lives in Rome? Still a one legged deer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? IRS. Youre being audited, Sir.

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Q: If Alma have 4 corners..? A: Then there must be something wrong with Alma...

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What did the man with no head say to the women?

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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A small mexican boy saves up enough money to buy his very own skateboard. His mother is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops