chinga tue madre Ryan

A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

There was a man posting an anti-joke... He had no life

Why did the blond girl walk into the street pole? Because she wasn't paying attention.

Q: Who would win in a fight, Chuck Norris, or a Tank? A: Chuck Norris, because his hidden fist in his chin gives him 3 fists to the tank's 0.

three lesbians on a plane they were all responsible and had sex when they got home and not on the plane

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was drunk.

What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

what did the lawyer say to the lawyer? "whats up lawyer?" what did the banana say to the banana? nothing bananas dint talk...

whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

A blonde just got a call from her boyfriend. He said i'll meet you at your house, so the blonde drove home, excited. Once the blonde got home her boyfriend was having sex with another girl. The blonde burst into tears and pulled out her gun then stuck it to her head. " No dont do it!" her boyfriend said!...... the blonde, not knowing what to do next said, " Shut up you cheater you're next!"

Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

How do you kill a deer? You don't, you just let it be because that's what a decent human being would do.

Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

What did the boy dog say to the girl dog? Ruff

What did the Asian say to the American? herro. rook at me. i have round eye i american!

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

Why was six afraid of seven? 7 is greater than 6. Didn't you learn about number lines in 3rd grade?

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What's funnier than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans.

so a unicorn walks into a bar... and then i woke up

What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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