1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the boy reading the book do? He kept turning pages and reading until he came to the end, closed the book, and put it back onto the book shelf.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you make a white girl commit suicide? Bully her.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the young Mexican apply for a job at McDonalds? The economy is down and his family could use the extra money.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Thre jews walk into a bar i lied it was a gas chamber

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why was the little boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What are astronauts called in Soviet Russia? Cosmonauts

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why is the melon having a wedding? Because it cantaloupe.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What came first the egg or the hen? your mother did, when I had sex with her last night.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

thumb_up thumb_down +21

So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call white trash Garbage

thumb_up thumb_down +21

how do you save a black person that's drowning? you blow up their lips

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops