Knock knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your stupid.

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Why did the fat kid rob a pizza shop? Because he happened to like pizza.

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What's black and can't swim? A black shirt.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Btw I have aids And now you too

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What's red and has zippers? Nothing, because watermelons can't physically drive without the help of a sheeps spinal cords ... DUH

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why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a pedophile.

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What's Kanye West's main goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

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The queen having a shit

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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what do you call a black man with a knife in his hand? a surgeon.

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What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

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Q:Why did Santa, the tooth fairy, and a rich man jump out of a plane? A: On Christmas Eve, a rich man was skydiving and lost his tooth as he plummeted towards the beautiful plateau.

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk. What did u think he'd do, have coke-a-cola? Dumbass.

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Q:What did the Hulk say before the bartender refused to serve him further drinks? A: HULK SMASHED! Moral: "THE MORE DRUNK THE HULK GETS! BLURRIER HIS VISION BECOMES! HULK IS THE BLURRIEST THERE IS!"

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut, you ***ing racist.

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Hickory Dickory Dock, your mother is a whore

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a black man walked into a black bar. what color was the bar afterwards? the same color. its a drinking spot not a pole

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Why is it irrelevant whether someone is a twat or not? Love your neighbour.

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What do you call a jewish womans boobs? JUBES!

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why are there so many little girls falling off swing jokes? Because you tuch youself at night.

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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