once, my brother took my lard and gave it to the less fortunet

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If Irishmen didn't walk out of bars, they would collect and eventually fill the bars of the world and would die given the bars could not support them.

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Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

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You know what happens when there's an awkward silence... Everyone feels a little bit uncomfortable for a brief moment in time.

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A dog walks into a club. Just kidding I hit the dog with a club multiple times, killed it, and went to jail for the murder of an innocent animal.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

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What do humans and trees have in common? -If you hit them with an ax multiple times, they fal down

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What do you call a person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk? A person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk.

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your mums so fat! "last time i heard that i fell of my dinosaur!!" Oh man are you ok?

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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What do gay kittens eat? Cat food. Friskies and Fancy Feast are both popular brands.

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A man walks into a bar,gets a drink, and then leaves.

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why did jim die? he had cancer why did jim have no hair? it started to fall out when he was 20 and now he is bald at 30 years old

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Where is Sally hiding? She was kidnapped and has probably been murdered, I lied about her hiding.

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Guest what? Dog

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What happens when you throw a blue rock into red water? It gets wet...

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Q: Why was the little girl not allowed to watch the pirate film? A: Due to the violent scenes and coarse language, her parents decided it was inappropriate.

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what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

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your momma is so poor that she is on welfare.

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what is long, white, and used almost everywhere? there are a lot of things that fit this description, so it would be highly illogical to make a guess.

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Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

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What did the old man say? Im old

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops