Why did the man yell at his wall? Because it jumped out and scared him when he walked past

Why do woman cook dinner? Because their husband has 6 jobs and is trying to support his family so she does a part and cooks dinner.

How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

Roses are red violets are blue this poem is stupid.

What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

What did the flower say to it's friends? I want to kill a Christmas tree.

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? What do you mean what's the difference?!?! One of them is a fucking elephant!

If life gives you lemons, You have a problem and you might need medicine.

Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

what is the coolest thing in the world? hashtag swagbag yolo

what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

What's 9+10? 19

Roses are blue Violets are red This isn't humor The Hell's wrong with you?

Your mama so fat that when she cut herself gravey came out and we drank it too!

don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

Why did the shrimp refuse to share? Because he was a little shellfish.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue You wouldn't know that Cause you're a dog.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut, you ***ing racist.

What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

2001, 2 airplains fly into the world trait centers. the pilots then had their licences taken away.

What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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