Why Did the man Commit suicide? His body used cellular respiration to make ATP (A form of energy) and his body used it to send electrical signals to his index finger to pull the trigger on his .357 Magnum, thus putting a bullet through the soft tissue in his brain causing his body to shut down Imediately!

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why did the golfer ware two ares of paents. if he got a hole in one

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How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

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what you get time to go with? - a clock

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What do you call Bob if he gets a nose ring? Bob

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Why did the boy fall asleep in class? He was tired.

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What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

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Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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What do you call a man who only eats fast food? Unhealthy.

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Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not a blind guy.

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my mind's eye?

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A man walks into a bar. Nothing happens that's worth explaining.

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what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

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My friend thought that an onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I threw a watermelon at his face.

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what happened to the man who got hit by a truck driven by Obama? he died.

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Your mamma's so dumb, we are seriously worried she might hurt herself.

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

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What's difficult and tedious to do? Trying to find a joke with 0 thumbs up/down -Sykes

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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A man walks into an oven. He suffers severe burns and dies on a hospital bed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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