Wanna hear a joke? Your contact list.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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A Jewish man walkes into grocery store. He buys some groceries, and leaves.

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What's red and green and goes round and round? A kilt at a scottish dance

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? Because his parents are dead.

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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What did the black guy say to you when you took his fried chicken Give me back my chicken

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

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What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

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Guess what what?? chicken butt!!!!!

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What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

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how many drunk drivers does it take to drive home one and only one, if more than one drunk driver tried to drive home at the same time in the same car they would surely crash and not make it home.

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a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, i, j, k, l, m, n, o, p, q, refrigerator.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

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Q: Why did the Jew have to go to a concentration camp? A: Because he was Jewish

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Hillary Clinton and 2 male aides were on a plane on a Friday evening which us not unusual for a secretary of state.

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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a man walks into a house... then realizes its not his house and leaves.

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Nero? You are alive? Holy shit! You are like so my hero! I love you man! I was so saddened to hear you where tortured and killed, but then I read about this "Axel Knight" and hoped it was you, it sure sounded like you! Please tell me its no joke, you are a hero around these parts, and we really miss you, honestly sir, is it true point zero has become some sort of utopia or are the painkillers making you a bit Hazy? I am Erica by the way, still with the order, but what is this about your empire?

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one stop shop

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what's better than winning a gold metal at the special olympics? not being retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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