a jew, a muslim and a christian all walk into a bar; because of the difference in religion im afraid such an event is unlikely to occur in the future.

two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

What happens when an antijoke and a joke comes together? Unicorns mate with Neil Patrick Harris

yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

What's black and yellow and flies? I dont know.

Your momma's so stupid, she threw out all the W's in the m&m's packet

A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says, "What'll it be?" The duck says "Got any grapes?"

Do you know whats a joke? Something said or done to evoke laughter or amusement, especially an amusing story with a punch line.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

find the o 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duh its up top

Why does an ostrich have such a long neck? Because its head is so far from its body.

Why did the kid poo his pants? Because he was Matt Daly

What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

One day I went to the shop and bought some milk. THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE turtle man came with me. YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE live action

Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb...1 How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb...2

What do you get when two chickens cross a road? -Salmonella stricken hobos

Why was six afraid of seven? The world may never know.

if got a joke if fogot it

How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

Why did little Katie fall off her bike? Because the postman killed the bee hive.

A clueless chicken walks into a bar. Now being cooked on the BBQ.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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