mat (telling anti joke): so you are stranded in a desert, right and kyle: no. Mat: no man i'm Kyle: no (kyle was later found dead)

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Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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What do you call a gynochologist named John? John

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because if he stayed on the farm, he would have been condemned to a miserable life, subjected to deplorable living conditions and an eventual pain-filled death by the hand of a cruel and heartless farmer. Crossing that road was his only chance of salvation.

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Homeless man....it's what's for dinner!

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What Do You Call A Black Guy Surrounded By Nine White Guys With Bats? Jackie Robinson.

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What would happen if an unstoppable object hit and unmovable object? I don't know, I was just wondering

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So the priest took the 6 year old boy into the confessional...and He told him to say 3 Hail Mary's.

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What's better than a gold brick? 2 gold bricks.

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What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

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What do you do if a bird shuts on your windscreen? A:never take her out again.

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here is a good joke... your moms a bitch END OF STORY!

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yo mamas so poor she should probably consider finding a job

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Want to burn 3000 calories in under 5 MINUTES? Take a store bought pizza and put it in the over for as long as you want. Just watch the calories burn away in a puff of smoke!

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

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What do you call a Mexican policeman? Officer.

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Who was at the door when Helen Keller answered? She doesn't know

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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jordan godfrey is good looking lolololol

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops