A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

if any1 wants contact with me, nina, call me on my cell at 879-555-0934 im looking for a short, chubby man with a hungering taste of mexican taste

My favorite color is Ham. And I can count to Potato.

THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't know any better. It very recently was decapitated in order tofeed the farmers family.

Your family is so fat that when their feet hit the ground, it recorded 9 on the richter scale, because they were launched at the Earth at close to the speed of light, and when you account for relativistic mass effects, the amount of energy that was displaced into the ground was tremendous

Womens rights.

Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

Whats green and has wheels?? - Grass, I lied about the wheels

I went to a restaurant, but after I ate the food felt sick, then I remembered that I ordered penis with cum Popsicles so I knew it couldn't be the food

I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120mph car crash

what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer

whats 7+4? 74

Knock knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your stupid.

Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

What did the monster under the bed say to another monster? I have the odd feeling that someone is on top of the bed.........

The doctor woke up and the hooker he screwed told him she had the clap and he said thats the least of your problms bitch you have aids

what did one dog say to his sex partner? woof woof

What do Michael Jackson and a throbbing, greasy, overcooked Shitake Mushroom have in common? Nothing. Just nothing at all.

Wanna here a joke? Dylan Shipleys penis!!!

Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

Knock-Knock Whos there? You You who? Yoohoo! is anybody home?!! Well obviously or i wouldn't have talked to you. Idiots these days!

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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