What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

What's wet and pink and fun to watch in someone's face? A big bubble gum bubble exploding into someone's face.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But his one doesn't.

Vaginas are like? books. You stick your dick in them.

i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

Black people having a Job.

What day comes after Friday? Saturday, and Sunday comes afterwards.

How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

Why does Chuck Norris own a can named Chuck Norris? because he is self-centered due to all the attention payed to him for virtually no reason at all.

What was wrong with the tomato? Nothing.

I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

Why is this the worst joke ever? Because it isn't even funny.

Lil Wayne's song 6 foot 7 foot was named after my wewe

What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

Q: What's Funnier than a baby spinning around a pole at 300 MPH? A: Stopping it with a shovel.

Donald Trump

Yo mama so fat she has to wear large clothes

Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

i did ur mom lol. thats the joke. : )

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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