An irishman walks into a bar and stays there until he goes home.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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Im gay What about you

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What is funnier than 24 69

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who let the dogs out my mom because they're fat and need exercise

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Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

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Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

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Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

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Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

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What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his failing marriage.

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What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

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What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

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So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

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Roses are red Violets are blue Btw I have aids And now you too

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What's worse than getting a papercut? Literally anything.

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Whats the difference between a black bird and a white bird? Their colour

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

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How do you get a nun pregnant? Artificial insemination.

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What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

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Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

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Why did the middle-eastern man fly his plane into the Empire State Building? Because he was a bad pilot with an interest in American architecture.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing?? ShE had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there? Not Susie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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