Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

Antoni Wilkinsin

Q: What happened when Cupid shot his arrow into the guys heart? A: He died

What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

how do you starve a black man? hide his food stamps in his work boots.

Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

Why was the little boy sad Because he has depression from his father beating him over and over every time he comes home from school...

how much c o c k could a n i g g e r lick if a f a g g o t licked a d i c k

Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have multi-personality disorder. Patient: Which one of us?

What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

Why did the dog cross the road? Because the pizza man saw how hungry he was and left a pizza for the dog. So when the dog saw the pizza he went to go get the pizza, because he was hungry. In hindsight the moral of the story is: if you ever see a hungry dog on the other side of the road, become a pizza man (if you aren't already) and give him a pizza.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because he had legs.

The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

A bunch of teens were egging the house of their science teacher for giving them homework over break. They got caught by their teacher's ex-husband and he told them, "She broke up with me for telling her she was being too hard on her students. So, my friends, egg on!!!!!"

What did the bartender say to the fat guy? Hi

Nock nock Who's there K K who? You forgot the K

How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

Yo momma so fat she ate a tape worm which had to be surgically removed because it further increased her health problems. She's still fat.

Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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