Roses are red, Violets are violet,

Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

Your mom is so stupid that she was unable to make it into the college of her choice.

What did one dinosaur say to the other? Nothing and if you think dinosaurs talk you might need to be diagnosed for having Schizophrenia. Invega is a subtle treatment.

There were two men 1 says "hey stupid" and the other man says "Yeah"

Once upon a time, Ducks THE END

Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

Killing people is not illegal just ask a soldier

A Jew walks into a bar, he buys it.

What liquid is white and sticky and annoying to get on your hand? Glue.

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Mr Dalgleish in a formal setting, Kenny in an informal one.

Man #1: What was the hardest part about watching that kid get hit by that bus? Man #2: My dick...

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? This is no time to make insensative jokes you dick, Billy's on a hospital bed.

A man used a ruler to measure his foot, it was size 11

Why is Tommy dead? Because he died.

A fish swims up your penis...

Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

There was a curtain who sneezed and then asked you for a tissue. He was in a room with two chairs a coffee table and a 37 year old bookcase, why did he sneeze???? Because he had a cold!!????

Why did it rain happiness? The people who wrote the jokes above and below this one exploded.

Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

Can God do anything even if it's impossible? Yes. Can God make a rock so heavy he can't lift it? Yes. Can he lift that rock? Yes. Then he just failed at making a rock so heavy he can't lift it

why did the drug dealer die... because he got terminal cancer and died during the first 3 weeks

A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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