How many electricians does it take to fix a light bulb? One

What do you do If you can't afford a hair cut? Don't get one.

What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

What did one lawyer say to the other? Hello

Three men walk into a bar. Something happens not at relating to them.

* Are you deaf? * Yes, as I love paradoxes.

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

What did one lion say to the other lion? Nothing. There was no other lion. This particular lion had horrible social anxiety so he spent most of his time alone, eating buffalo poop and playing World of Warcraft thus further alienating himself from the other lions. He was a very lonely lion.

So a seal walks into a club.

Why is my son hungry? Because he didn't eat lunch.

Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

What's sad about black people that drink grape soda and eat fried chicken? The stereotypes are true.

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road ? A. Because he had grown tired of living thus choosing to end his life.

Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

how do you make Chuck Norris laugh? tell him an anti-joke.

how do you make a plumer cry kill his family

You know what they say about fat thumbs? They give a lot of accidental comment likes on statuses.

Sex

Roses are red Violets are blue I love you so much That is a an example of the 2nd person and the identification of plants and their colors

A guy walks into a bar. After only 10 minutes, he leaves. The bar closes in 10 minutes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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