How many babies can you fit in a bottle? None, a bottle is too small

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

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What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

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there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

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What do you call a black stormtrooper. What ever his name happens to be.

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Your mother is overweight. This is largely due to her sedentary lifestyle.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why'd he fall off again? Because we put him back on.

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What's purple, green, and orange? Dead baby with slashed floaties. What's black, purple, and orange? Same baby two weeks later.

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What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

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Why wasn't Hellen Keller a good driver? She didnt get her driver license...

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What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

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Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

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ask me if i am a tree. no.

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why did the boy scream? because he got shot.

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1 black guy jumped off a cliff at the same time as a white guy, who fell first? The one who weighed the most.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

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Why was the boy sad he ate a loaf of bread? Because ducks ate him alive after that.

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If it looks like grass, smells like grass, and tastes like grass... Then you were honestly misled when ordering that salad.

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Doctor: Knock knock. Patient: Whose there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor. Patient: Interrupting doc... Doctor: Your son has AIDS and will die soon.

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Why did the fridge break? Because someone threw a fridge at it.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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knock knock. who's there? no one. no one who? no one who?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daffodils are yellow, Flowers come in lots of colours...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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