A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven. Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" "No," the man replies, "I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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A man walks into a bar, he is then escorted to the hospital as a result of brain trauma.

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What's the same between a white guy and a black guy? They are both white except for the black guy.

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Sad reality is that, you have a tab open just for ponies don't you?

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Q: How do you give a frigid woman an orgasm? A: By making her come.

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Oh no my baby is dead. Ha.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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Why was the asian bad at sex? Because he was 5 years old

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Why was the boy sad he ate a loaf of bread? Because ducks ate him alive after that.

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Once a upon a time there was a girl named Cinderella. She rubbed a magic lamp and a genie appeared. Then a guy named Larry Harry walks into a laundry mat. 7 days later she died.

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A black man, a Mexican man, and a cop are walking in downtown New York. So are tens of thousands of other people, because it is a very large and diverse city.

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Why did Charlie eat a baked potato? Because he was hungry.

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why did the man steal change from the tip jar? he wanted another state quarter for his collection

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Nobody knows as humans are unable to understand the way dogs communicate.

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What do you call a black man that flies a plane? A pilot you racist bastard!

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Why was Timmy sore? He'd been playing with his cornhole along with his friends all day!

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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Where would it be hard to find handicapped parking? At the paralympics.

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Knock knock Who's there Done Done who? Done with waiting out here, let me in you dick!

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what would u do if you were having anal sex with a black guy and his penis was sooooo big that it ripped ur asshole? staple it back together

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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What did the orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

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A blonde went to buy a Pizza and after ordering, the assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve. "Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"

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why is brennan hart a dumbass idk ask his mom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops