Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

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I read the terms of service.

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So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Q: How many Jews can fit in a car? A: 5 in a standard mid sized sedan, or 7 in an SUV

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Why did a 36 year old Asian man stop in the middle of raping someone A: He realized that what he was doing was immoral and that it could scar someone for the rest of there lives and that he could serve a sentence of up to 35 years which would mean he would miss out on the special offers that QVC has to offer during this time

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what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

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How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

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What do you call 100 dead babies in my garage? Murder.

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Do you want to hear a joke? Well you can't because you are reading this

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A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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What did the girl say when she was getting raped? "Stop, you're hurting me."

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What do you call an Arab guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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Q: Whats the deifference between me and you A: The fact that im the beautiful one -RDV

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Did you hear the joke about the pencil? Nevermind it was pointless.

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Knock knock. Who's there. Suidi Arabia. Suida Arabia who? Huh? I was too busy loading my weaponry

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Why is Abraham Lincoln a bad driver? Because he is dead.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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