Q: How do you tell a Jewish person that you love them? A: You tell them "I love you".

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

Why doesnt snow like Asians? Snow is a form of precipitation within the Earth's atmosphere in the form of crystalline water ice, consisting of a multitude of snowflakes that fall from clouds. Since snow is composed of small ice particles, it is a granular material. It has an open and therefore soft structure, unless packed by external pressure. Snowflakes come in a variety of sizes and shapes. Types which fall in the form of a ball due to melting and refreezing, rather than a flake, are known as graupel, ice pellets or snow grains. Therefore since snow is unhuman they are then thus incapable of emotions because they lack any vitals organs.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

Why did the blind man get hit by a bus? Because his seeing-eye dog was distracted by a squirrel and ran off, leaving the man in the middle of the cross-walk in heavy traffic.

have u been drinking cannabel soup because you........ahhhhh!!!!! why are you trying to eat me!

what did the apple say to the orange ? nothing, apples are a fruit and do not have any organs which allow it to be able to talk.

Q. Name six animals that live in the north pole A.Four polar-bears and two penguins

CFL

69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

what is black and is a really bad neighbor. your bad neighbor wearing a black shirt.

Why did the head football coach go to the bank? Not to get his quarter back cause that'll cost him at least ten million a year.

A man walks into a woman's bedroom... But I was already bored of the plot so I skipped to the end of the pornographic video.

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

How did the black person die? Of old age

An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

How many amish people does it take to screw in a light blub? None as the amish don't require artificial light

What did the chipmunk say to the nut? I'm gonna eat you.

Why did the man die? because he hit his head and drowned

How do you make Yoda sad? Kill all of his friends.

Your mother is so fat, that somebody should inform her of the risks of eating unhealthy foods because she could obtain life threatening diseases.

Anybody else hate when people mispell words in jokes It ruins the joke Most them prob some scumbags Probs to Jeffrey K April 12, 2013 1:55 PM

Q: What do you get when you throw a piece of bread in the oven? A: 6 million Jews

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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