Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

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Why couldn't timmy brush his hair? He had leukaemia

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An atheist and a priest agree to a public debate. The priest doesn't make much of an attempt to argue because there is a young boy in his podium giving him a handjob.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

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Why was the cancer ward sad? They just lost a patient who couldn't ward off cancer.

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Immaculate Misconception - Motionless In White \m/

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Gentlemen, when she says no, she always means yes. Unless, of course, your rhetoric is of a sexual nature.

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Why did I the granda fall out of her wheel chair?. She fell down the steps

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A black kid, a white kid, an Asian, and a Dane all take acid in a room. They have a profound experience and find a greater meaning in life.

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Two friends sit down at a table for lunch. One, in a very frustrated mood, says to the other, "You know what I don't get?" His friend immediately responds: "Sex."

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your neighbor. Ok, Come in.

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What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

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What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

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a christian man asked god a question. he did not get an answer. a jewish man asked god a question. he did not get an answer. a muslim man asked god a question. he too, did not get an answer. an atheist man asked god a question. he got his answer.

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Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

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What is a dog's favorite color? Dogs are colorblind and can not see colors.

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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There are two kinds of people: Those who have a life, and those who read anti-jokes

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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why did the person die? He was 90 years old and was sick. Its natural

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Q: How do get a person to leave you alone ? A: Suck out his eye-balls stuff them in your ears to muffle the sound of his screaming as you head-butt him into a fine paste. Then proceed to spread or squeeze sed paste on to delicious food substance and eat sed delicious food substance. Then carry on with the rest of your day like nothing happened. (P.S. Just ignore any letters about court cases or arrests)

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Why do black people have white hands and feet? Regardless of race or ethnicity, the skin on the palms and soles of the feet is always less pigmented than elsewhere on the body. In darker skinned people this fact is readily observable, but in light skinned people this feature of human biology cannot normally be discerned by simple visual inspection.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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