Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

What's worse than the Holocaust? The eventual extinction of humanity, followed by the death of the universe.

A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

What's worse than tripping over a tree root? The destruction of the ancient city of Pompeii in A.D. 79. Though tripping over a tree root may hurt and result in the victim bleeding profusely, we live in the 21st century and at any time can call a doctor using a cellular device called a phone. In A.D. 79, no technology in this category existed. People were overpowered by the rage of a mountain that they believed was a sign of the wrath of the heavens. People had to flee the city and a majority of them we killed by either inhaling to much smoke or other causes. This continued for over 18 hours. Therefore, the destruction of Pompeii is far worse than tripping over a tree root.

What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

why was the black man scared of cats ? Because a gang of cats ate his family

What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor

Your mother is so heavy that she decided to try out nutrisystem

How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

What did the Catholic Priest say to the Altar Boy shortly after sex? Nothing. The feelings of shame and revulsion the priest felt about what he had just done meant he couldn't look him in the eye let alone talk to him.

Why did stevie get stabbed in the jugular by his sister? He was telling bad anti jokes.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

A black man, a jewish man and a white man walk into a bar. The black man shoots the bartender, the white man takes the money and the jewish man holds the customers hostage.

Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs; if we had some eggs.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He actaully never did. He only made it half way before a cop issued him with an infringement notice for jaywalking.

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

What do you call a black man standing on a sidewalk? Preferably race shouldn't matter in this situation, but in most social circumstances the man would be described as black to elucidate the person being depicted.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...