Knock Knock Who's There Seventeen Thirty Eight I'm like hey what's up hello Seen yo pretty ass soon as you came in that door I just wanna chill, got a sack for us to roll Married to the money, introduced her to my stove Showed her how to whip it, now she remixin' for low She my trap queen, let her hit the bando We be countin' up, watch how far them bands go We just set a goal, talkin' matchin' Lambos Got 56 a gram, prob' a 100 grams though Man, I swear I love her how she work the damn pole Hit the strip club, we be letting bands go Everybody hating, we just call them fans though In love with the money, I ain't never letting go And I get high with my baby (baby) I just left the mall, I'm getting fly with my baby, yeah

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Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

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what did the lamp say to the woman Nothing, a lamp is a plastic glass and metal inaminate object therfore it can not speak

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What did the man say to the young, blond athletic girl walking by? "Hi."

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What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

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Why is it stupid to call your son Bethany? It is commonly a girl's name.

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Q: What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage. But I don't have a pile of dead babies either. So, yeah.

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? your bike.

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What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

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Make me famous

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What did the guy day to the other guy with an afro on his head? You look like a guy with an afro on his head.

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

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When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

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How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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What's worse than someone who isn't racist? A racist.

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What do you call a baby with a shadow? A shadow-baby!

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What's green and red all over? That terminally ill child's vomit.

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Why couldn't the child go to the park? He was a registered sex offender.

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Q: There was a cinnamon bun and a cow out flying, one of them fell.. who? A: The cinnamon bun because cinnamon bun's can't fly.

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why did the baseball player strike out? he forgot the bat

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An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

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John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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