why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

Q: what did the hot dog say to the hamburger A: i want your buns

You know you have no friends when you write anti-jokes. [M]

Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

Who killed Lincoln Nobody knows

What did the Pikachu say to the Charmander? Pika pika pikachu pika!

A man gets into a joan Battle. He says Lamboguini Mercy your chick so thirsty then his pponent says Shut up Your chick is thirsty beacs yours face looks like a dried orange The man runs away Then the opponent realizes His Girlfrienn just aked Him for some water

Why is ur cousin gay? because ya dad

What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

whats the difference between valium and m & ms ? one is,nt a tasty little chocolate

One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

Why did the baby die? It got shot.

-How do you befriend Tom Hanks? -Kidnap his son

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

What did the homeless guy do when he found a quarter? He picked it up

Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

why was the man itchy? because he had herpies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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