What did the Pikachu say to the Charmander? Pika pika pikachu pika!

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why is ur cousin gay? because ya dad

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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whats the difference between valium and m & ms ? one is,nt a tasty little chocolate

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Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

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-How do you befriend Tom Hanks? -Kidnap his son

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What's a pirate's favorite letter? R, but they are also fond of the C.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

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What did the homeless guy do when he found a quarter? He picked it up

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So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fsh

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sexual offender.

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why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

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Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

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The AIDS patient was gay

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What's yellow and has six legs ? A cat. I may be wrong about the color and the legs, I'm color-blind and I can't count.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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