Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why don't traffic lights go swimming? Because they aren't sentient or animate, and therefore can't decide to undertake such an activity. Even if they were sentient, they wouldn't enjoy swimming as the water would damage their electrical works.

A man sees another man sitting on a bench with a pickle in his ear. He asks the man "Why do you have a pickle in your ear?" The other man replies "What? I couldn't hear you because I have a pickle in my ear."

A black man walks into a movie theatre... And pay for a ticket that would grant him access to watch the verity Of movies available to watch that month of screening. He picks the warhorse which was critically acclaimed by many respected critics. He watched and observed the positive and negative points of the the film. When it ended he took a long a ride home on the number 76 bus to ibswitch road where he lived during that time, and wrote about his opionion on the movie and how he thought the movie could be improved. He done this same routen for another six months, every saturday, until he died of aids shorty after a homosexual fling.

What do you get when you mix Lil Wayne and Lil John? A full size John Wayne

What did the Orange say to the Apple? Nothing. Both of them are lifeless objects, thus lacking the ability to speak.

Person One: Knock Knock Person Two: Whos there? Person One: You can see its obviously me because theres not really a door there.

What did the alcoholic say to the blind man? Nothing. But he beat his wife and kids savagely.

What's more horrible than Twilight? Hitler.

knock, knock Who's there? A social worker, we are taking your children into costody because your wife has reported you to the police for molesting them.

Q: What do you call an exact duplicate of Homer Simpson who's been enhanced with numerous special powers and a strength-boosting inducer among other beneficial additions? A: A mobidly overweigth individual who hasn't realized what the phrase, "Go on a diet", even denotes/implies.

What's black and self-describing? The words of this joke.

I forgot what i was gonna say

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

Why did the aeroplane fall out of the sky? An ant jumped on it

What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

What's the difference between an American and a British guy? Their fingerprints.

what is worse than the holocaust. interracial relationship, cough..... oli

whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

How did the Jew survive the holocaust? He didn't, he died.

ring around the rosie ... your dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...