Ellen: Knock knock Steve: Who's there? Ellen: Banana Steve: Banana who? Ellen is offline and can't receive messages right now.

What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

Roses are red Violets are blue Still the Holocaust

Why did the chicken cross the road. Because the grocery store only sold pork

I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

A working black man, Santa, and the Easter Bunny where walking down the street and find a penny, who picks it up? The working black man, Santa and the Easter Bunny take no payment for their work.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

i had a black friend once......just kidding

Why does Billy hate waiting in line? Because he's impatient.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was mentally retarded and didnt know any better.

Why did the girl start crying? Her pet sunflower had just died.

How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

A young boy trips and severly cuts his knee while running down his neighborhood street. He is promptly brought to the hospital to avoid receiving any serious infection.

If 3 days ago was yesterday and today is Friday, how many legs does 7 dogs, 3 ducks, and 2 chickens have if the answer was red? Okay, not to sound rude but I'm gonna take a wild guess and say.....yo mama is so fat when she read this joke she ate the whole bucket of popcorn and didn't even share.

My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

What's 10 + 3 x 22 ? Cake.

What do you call a black woman in a pool? Drowning.

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

A lady with alzheimers walks up to her friend and says" my nefew died today" and her friend replied.. " no he died three years ago."

why was the man at the tuna fish factory mad? because he was going through intense emotional trauma happening in his life because of problems with his wife and child.

Why was the Jimmy Sad? Because he had Autism.

A man looks in his toilet and gazes in fear of the fact that there is blood on his bowel movement. He has colitis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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