WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

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Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? having a worm sized penis.

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walk briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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Why did the man drown in the bath? He was a quadriplegic and couldn't support himself above the water.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally Sally who? Haha I'm just kidding, I'm Jorge.

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Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

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Your mother is so fat that when she went to get weighed she was diagnosed as clinically obese and later broke down into tears.

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

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Q: Why do only 10% of women go to heaven? Your question is fundamentally wrong. Religion is a collective hallucination.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A: The live one at the bottom trying to eat his way out. Q: What's worse than that? A: When he comes back for more.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Call the cops girl They can't unrape you

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What do you call a deer with only one leg? A one legged deer. What do you call a deer with one leg, one eye and lives in Rome? Still a one legged deer.

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What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because the farmer is obviously to stupid to build a proper chicken coop, and thus his chicken is crossing the road and will most likely be hit by a car

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Sloths

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Bob

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What's the difference between a jew and pizza? A Jew is human and pizza is food.

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Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: Because his mother just got raped.

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what do you do when your girlfriend gives you head while playing MW3? continue to play while politely asking her sister to make you a sandwhich

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops