Beached whale: "Look at me, I'm a land mammal"

Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

what did the aboriginal kid get for christmas? your bike.

Two biscuits were sitting in an oven. One says to the other hows it going, the other says nothing because he knows that biscuits can't talk.

What colour is an orange? Orange. What did you expect?

What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

727-8088-954 Call Me. Say your name is Nick whether or not your a guy or a girl.

Why was the Jewish man in jail? He lit a local CVS on fire.

If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

How many light bulbs does it take to garner an unnecessarily large crowd of a single ethnic group of people working together to simultaneously replace said light bulbs and uphold their cultural stereotypes? What the hell's a light bulb? I'm a culturally illiterate Amish man.

Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

How do you know a baby is dead ? When the dog plays with it more!

How do you put elephant in refrigerator? Open the door, and put the elephant in

What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

A White and a Chinese got in a fight, who won? None. The fight was unable to begin because a color is not a living organism.

WHO THE FUCK IS NERO AND THAT BITCH THAT CLAIMS TO BE NOT NERO BUT NOT NEROMETAL OR WHATEVER? THEY BOTH CLAIM TO BE THE FUCKING MORAL MAN? I STARTED MY RISE TO INFAMY FOR LIKE... Fuck, when I was still studying, it was a fucking social project to prove that others opinions DO NOT MATTER SHIT IN THE END! And now these bastards (some cult faggot and Some "Nerometal" which are probably the same queer) CLAIM TO BE THE MORALMAN? I AM THE MORAL MAN! I AM YOUR FRIENDLY RAPIST/SOCIOPATH! YOU FAKE QUEERMASTERS! I CHALLENGE YOU!

Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have PTSD. Time to kill myself.

Your mother sleeps around so much that I worry that she may be taking too much medicine for her insomnia.

Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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