Your friend is so retarded I am getting a bit worried and his mother should take him to get tested for mental retardation.

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Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

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Why couldnt the man stop dancing? He had Parkinson's.

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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What do you call a Mexican policeman? Officer.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

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Dora the explorer went on an adventure. sadly, all of the animals in the forest, including boots the monkey and swiper the fox, kill her as a sacrifice to an unknown God

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Why did little Susie fall off the cliff? I pushed her.

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How many illegal immigrants does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Illegal immigrants don't use lights, they'd get caught. Dumbass.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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How do you stop a black man from bleeding? You give him a bandaid. What if he keeps crying? Tell him to stop. What if he cries more? Buy him an ostrich.

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why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Oh wait! i don't care!

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what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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Stevie Wonders said to his friend, "Have you seen my house?" "No" "Neither have I"

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Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

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don't just stand there

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What did superman say when he flew into a building? Flying is inhumanly possible unless in an aircraft vehicle.

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I have read and agreed to the Terms of Service

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What's worse than someone who thinks Sting is a nice guy? Sting.

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why'd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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why did the boy fall to the ground? He was struck by lightning

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops