Why don't woman wear watches? Because there is a clock on the stove!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why was the little boy crying? He had dead mice shoved up his asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a black flying an airplane? A pilot you racist bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: What did the serail rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

thumb_up thumb_down -6

vatalk you are retarded!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what did the murderer say to the man... i'm going to kill you

thumb_up thumb_down -6

did you know hellen keller had a dog? niether did she

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A Penguin walk into a bar and asks "Have you seen my brother?" And the bartender replies "What does he look like?"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's black and white and enforces the rules at football games? A referee? Wow you're really smart.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Yo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled "HEY, KOOL-AID!"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: What does the fox say? A: Nothing. Foxes cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the difference between a ferrari and a penis? I don't have a stash of ferraris in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q. How do you make a chicken dance? A. I don't know I was asking you.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you stop a drunk driver? With a minivan and family of four.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the boy eat the chips? Because he was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Ellen: Knock knock Steve: Who's there? Ellen: Banana Steve: Banana who? Ellen is offline and can't receive messages right now.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the clam not like to share? The deep sea is a competitive environment, where survival of the fittest is prominent.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops