- Anti Joke

A woman asked a man in an elevator, "Did you fart?" The man honestly replied, "Yes. I didn't expect you to notice because it was the puffy kind."

What did the banana say to the tree? Nothing, bananas can't talk

Q: What does Harry Potter say when he answers the phone? A: "No, she's dead. This is her son."

How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

Terry's penis oh wait! what penis But I'm not a rapper

A man walked into a bar. He got drunk. What did u think he'd do, have coke-a-cola? Dumbass.

Knock knock Who's there? Hi I'm John from the jehovah witness society down the street and I'd love to talk to you about your beliefs! Would you like a pamphlet?

The queen having a shit

Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

Romeo and Juliet both die at the end of the book. HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHA i just screwed you guys over.

YOU: Whats the difference between a white guy and a black guy swimming in a pool? Nothing except one has melenan in their skin

in china a dog was being cooked on the grill he was seasoned ans eaten by a black man

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If I Had A Brick I Would Throw It At You

What did the orange say to the lemon? We are both alike but a differnt color

Q. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman? A. Cause you have to hollow out it's head! A blonde walked into a doctor's office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her, "What happened to your ear?" The blonde replied, "I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear. Still not satisfied, the doctor asked, "Well, what happened to the other ear?" "The sucker called again!"

I Raped And Killed A Little Girl Called Zoe. It All Started When I Raped A Girl In Her School, I Always Waited Outside Of Her School in my white van, one day the girl I raped before Zoe confronted me in my white van, I asked her if she wanted to see my puppies in the back of the van, she said yes, I locked her in there, I kidnapped her. The next day that girl Mysteriously Died. Iwonder how? Tee hee hee... The next day Zoe came up to my van, She also said yes about the puppies too! I kidnapped her and raped her. The next day I was rushed to hospital, I was revealed by the doctor I Had Been Diagnosed With HIV, I knew it was from her because she is the only girl I'd raped, So I walked home. When I Was Walking Home, I Was Thinking About How Angry I Was With That Lil' Bitch; I Was Thinking of ways to kill her, when I got home I heard her listen to; Bang Bang~ By Ariana Grande, Nikki Minaj And Jessie J. That Got Me thinking, Ah, that's how I am going to kill her. So I opened my cage and Got my gun out; I killed her. Blood Was Dripping Down from her head, I Grabbed the corpse and put It in my basement, after that I started licking her fanny, Drinking Her pussy juice. Then I drained all of her Blood out of her body and bottled it. After all the draining I had 600,000 Bottles. I Drunk one of them. and may I just say: it was delicious! After that, I went online and sold all the bottles to I.Am.A.Vampire.Com For £1million Pounds!! Man is now mega rich and I brought a slut and fucked her. I Now lift a fucking amazing life because of a vulnerable, Dumb Ass girl called Zoe. Thank you!!!!!

How many fat people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to hold the ladder, another to screw it in. The third one stands to the side, just in case it breaks.

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. Due to the height of the fall, one of his ribs pierced his heart and he also suffered extensive head trauma and internal bleeding due to the force when he hit the floor, where he lay in agony for several hours before dying a slow, painful death.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car and laying on the side of the rode for 2 hours then you find out that your wife was cheating on you with her your own brouther

Doctor: I'm gunna try to fit your illness into an everyday, normal conversation. Is that okay? Patient: okay. Doctor: how are you? Patient: fine... Doctor: that's weird.. Because you have AIDS

Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

What's the difference between Justin Bieber and R. Kelly? One is an arrogant asshole known for pissing on things, the other is R. Kelly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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