Why did sally fall off the swing? She got her arms cut off. Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What do you call your mom? Mom

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I thought about taking a nice warm shower, but then I realized that the power was out and it would probably be a cold shower.

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A black kid, a white kid, an Asian, and a Dane all take acid in a room. They have a profound experience and find a greater meaning in life.

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

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If a blonde and a feather were dropped off of a building at the same time, which would hit the ground first? A feather is a light object and would most likely float all the way down at a slow velocity, the blonde is most likely 100+ pounds and would die because she is stupid.

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Mahjdichdhsjxidjhsbxu shcowiqx own hdqu Hedgehog the third

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Q: Where's the cheese? Who ate the cheese? A: How do you know it's been eaten because it's gone? Are you making the assumption that food that has disappeared was eaten because that is usually how food disappears? I am filing a lawsuit against you for your malevolent foodism.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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What did the Chicken say to the Turkey Nothing, Chickens don't talk.

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On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

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here's my two cents worth! *hands you two pennies , entire life savings*

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Q:Why did the little girl fall out of the swing? A:Because she had no arms.

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That is so fetch

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What do you call a black guy who gives out change? A cashier.

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ring around the rosie ... your dead

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what is worse than the holocaust. interracial relationship, cough..... oli

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm locked in someone's basement, Please help me.

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot a carrot

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

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a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

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Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops