What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Justin Bieber

What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

If life throws you fried chicken your probably black

Did you hear about the guy who lost his whole left side??? Yeah he's all right now!!!

Adam Sandler is still funny ! *cough*

What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

A van drives into a car.

What sound does a baby in a blender make? I don't know, I was too busy masturbating.

There are too many people in this bar, a man says. He then walks out of the bar and proceeds to visit his grandmother. Orange.

What did Hitler get for Christmas? Some shoelaces for his shoes so he could tie his little knotsies.

What did the very inquisitive poor black guy say to the very rich white man at the train station? Nothing, they didn't know each other. And they both had their iPods in. And they were at different train stations. And they were in different countries. And the black guy died 20 years ago.

Why was the black guy running away with a sack full of money? He was rushing to local charity to donate the money. It was closing in 2 minutes.

What did the tractor say to the farmer? Nothing, tractors don't talk

Why did the man shoot up the movie theater? Because he spent his whole child hood playing Call of Duty Black Ops II, Left 4 Dead 2, and Minesweeper. And video games, are the only thing that would rive someone to shoot up a movie theater.

One time, I called the police, but it was actually a fire. So my neighbors died.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

American: Nice cowboy hat Australian: hahahahahaha American: What's so funny? Australian: You're so incompetent... American: What does incompetent mean? Australian: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/7/78/Trollface.svg/200px-Trollface.svg.png

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Presents

Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road A. Because he needed to get to the other side

What did the father give to his son with terminal cancer for his 5th birthday? Nothing the kids going to die anyway

I was watching two muffins baking in an oven. One said to the other, "Wow, it's hot in here." The other one said "Wow! A talking muffin!" I went to my psychiatrist the next day, to increase the dosage on my medication.

so a man walks into a bar..... and says ouch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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