What do you call a moving tree? A hurricane killing thousands of people and 3 dogs.

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There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

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Why didn't the girl make the basketball team? She has no arms or legs.

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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Q;How many screams does it take to ruin a good riddle? A: OOOOOONNNNEEEEEEEEEEE! Moral: This potentially awesome riddle may or may not have been aborted by a scream.

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What is the similarity between an elephant and a grape? Absolutely nothing. One is an animal, while the other is a fruit.

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- What do you call a black man who drives a bus? - An african american bus driver.

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"George? I wanna tend da wabbits, George" - Lennie Smalls

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Q: why did the dad drop his baby? A: she was slippery.

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Q: Buttsex? A: Butsex!

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What's read,bubbly and looks out the window? A baby in a microwave

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Why haven't any women go to the moon? Cause it still doesn't need cleaning.

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So the man goes to the doctor and the doctor tells the man " you will have to quit masturbating " So the man asks " why" And the doctor said " so I can examine you "

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A woman says Renae has a butt... Two men say we don't care we have her hammer. True story.

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Why is adam jackson so black when his parents are white? their was alot of black dick up their during the pregnency. (once you go black, you NEVER go back!)

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why can't johnny compete in the track race? because he has no feet.

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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A man and a Rabbit are in a bar , the Rabbit looks at the man and says, none of this is real.

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Knock Knock I'm sorry but the new don't ask don't tell laws require me to not answer but do feel free to come in for some tea.

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three gay men were sitting in a hottub. a condom floats to the surface. why the hell were you watching them?

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Why did it take the rabbit so long to enter the rabbithole? Because he was hit by a truck and lost a lot of blood.

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What do you do when your archenemy walks up to you? Kill them due to their vulnerability, I mean they walked up to you...

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If a black person gets a tan, what do you get? A burned black sausage.

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When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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