If you're happy and you know it get a life

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Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: the WNBA

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Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

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A man is walking in a bar and then leaves once he gets his drink

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yo mummas so FAT to get to the other side

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Roses are red Violets are blue I kinda have a bad memory What are we doing again?

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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so a unicorn walks into a bar... and then i woke up

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Tulips are brown, I need to stop working on my flower garden after fisting a cows butthole.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SPONGEBO... nope bin laden

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Tina: Mom, would you love me if I was straight Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was gay Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was Bi Mom: No Tina: Why not Mom: Because that's selfish!

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What did your mother say after I beat her? Nothing, because she was dead.

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What did the monkey say to the African American? Monkeys cannot speak, therefore it would not be able to communicate with an African American, who is an equally respected member of the community, in an efficient way.

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What's the difference between Jew and a bread? Bread does not scream when you put him in oven.

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why doesnt jesus play hockey? he got nailed to the boards

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What's black and white and red all over? A dying zebra.

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Kim Jong Un thinks that he is in shape. And when you think about it, he's right. Round is a shape.

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Q: What do you call a girl with no arms or legs, is blind, has no parents, has cancer, and is dyslexic? A: Suzie

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Dolly Parton's bobbs are so fake that they both have silicone in them.

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Who's looking for judicial toenail clippings?

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Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

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It was Valentines Day today, I thought I should get her something... I brought flowers to her grave.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? none, you can't see them in the dark. Vincent

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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