What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

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Why'd the dead man cross the road? He didn't, he was dead, therefore incapable of doing anything at all.

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what do u call a kid with autism? a autistic s.o.b or Hennon bart

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Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

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a blind man walks into a wall

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A priest, a pastor, and a rabbi walk into a bar. All three are alcoholics and have done irreparable damage to their livers.

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Q: What did the pedestrian say to the bus driver that hit him? A: Nothing, he died.

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Niall Horan

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

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Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

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Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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How do you kill a blonde girl? You put a scratch and sniff sticker on the bottom of a filled pool.

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What's funnier than a chicken? nothing.

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Knock knock Who's there? Justin Bieber OH MY GOD REALLY?! No.

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what do mexicans and grass have in common You find them both in your front yard

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What's better than singing in the rain? Singing in a Pitt of fire. Oh wait that would be way worse than singing in the rain

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ROSES ARE RED VILOIT ARE BLUE MY NAME IS MISIMOA AND I SMELL LIKE POO

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Whats sad about a black man killing himself? That shaft DVD that he rented will probably be late now.

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Q:Whats the difference between NBC and the NBA? A: The NBA is the National Basketball Assocation and NBC is The No Body Cares.

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? Whenever your appointment is scheduled.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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your mother is so fat that her doctor advised her to stick to a strict diet and exercise routine to help her lose weight

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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