Why did Oliver fall? He shot himself.

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Q; What feels like plastic and tastes fake? A: School Food

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Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

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Yo momma so normal, she got married, had three kids and then lived a dull but contented life.

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Why does sammy have a cut on her arm? becuase her mom went to go stab her dad and missed

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, but I'm late for work.

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What did the orphan get for christmas........Cancer

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What did the little orphan girl get for christmas? nothing her parents are dead

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

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A pig walks into a bar and says, "Oink."

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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

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What did the man with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike

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Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

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What did one dog say the the other dog? "We are both dogs"

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What do you call a Man who likes little childeren A Nittany Lion.

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A blind man walks into a bar After realising he might be hurt everybody rushes to his aid

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fish fishy caoimhin

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A fish walks into a bar. He proceeds to talk the bartender. "Blub blub blub" The fish sitting next to him whispers to the bartender. "What is he talking about." The bartender shrugs.

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When would you find a Mexican, Asian, Black and white guy hanging out? Never

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How many gays does it take to change a light bulb? 1, even if hes not happy im sure he would still be able to change it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? No. Trees don't jump

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops