roses are red violet is blue why rik go to the hospital ? cause he eat glue.

Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

What did grandma get little Benjamin for Christmas? Nothing, she died last year

what lies in ore an develops a golden tan ken bigleys body

Why did Lisa fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms... A: Knock Knock B: Whos there? A: Definitely not Lisa....

What has wheels and is green all over? Grass... I was just kidding about the wheels.

Why did the prince kiss his beloved just before going into battle? Intermission.

Why was the dyslexic cowboy crying when he came into school that day? He had chronic diarrhea.

Caramel Boing.

Why did the Mexican cross the border? He wanted to live a better life in pursuit of freedom and a better job.

Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

oh whatever Greece isn't going to leave the eurozone shut up about it already

Knock Knock. There was no answer.

In other news, a Florida man was arrested today for stealing candy...with a knife.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

what do you call it when everyone becomes tolerant about gender identity. whatever pronoun it prefers.

Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

How did the Jew survive the holocaust? He didn't, he died.

Two Eskimos are in a bath tub. One says pass the soap. The other says no soap; radio.

What colour is chocolate? Brown.

Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to one tree 1 baby nailed to 10

Q: What do you call cheese that's not your own? A: Someone else's cheese

A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, did you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate replies, "Arrrgh, there's been a horrible nautical accident. Please call an ambulance immediately."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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