- Anti Joke

David shut the fuck up your cat has asthma and i dropped a weight on its little fucking head that pikey should of drowned it furthermore your sister looks like a greasy alien

Why did the kid with no legs fall down the stairs? Because his dad pushed him...

Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

Roses are red violets are purple what the hell happened to your ugly face

How did the little boy fall off his bycicle? Prior to this incident, a psychopathetic killer murdered his family. Therefore, to escape the killer, the boy got onto his bycicle in hopes of manuvering away from the threat. Since it was nighttime he did not notice the fault in the asphalt.( No ryhme intendid.) From flipping over his handlebars, he fell unconcious. Upon the killer spotting the boy, he sliced his head off and left the scene to not be spotted by police.

A vegetarian walked into a butcher Luckily he realized where he was and walked out!

You are so ugly that when you were born the doctor didn't say anything to your mother because he has social manners.

What did the two homosexual dolphins do when nobody was around? They continued on their way because neither of them had met.

Why do black people eat Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because there is Protein in chicken and without protein their bodies would succumb to such diseases as Kwashiorkor and Cachexia.

A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

Yo mama so fat that when she jumped into a pool she displaced more water than someone who was of a normal weight

Whats grosser than a bloody hand? 2 bloody hands.

A young man walks up and sits down at the bar. "What can I get you?" asks the bartender. "I want six shots of whisky," responds the young man. "Six shots? What’s the occasion?" asks the barman. "My first blowjob." "Well, in that case, let me give you a seventh on the house." To which the young man replies, "No offence sir, but if six shots won't get rid of the taste, nothing will."

A man and his wife are disagreeing about what type of car to get. The wife continously nags him about getting her something that will go from 0-200 in 4 seconds, so he gets her a scale and buys himself a truck, 1 min later an abulance is called because the wife hit the husband with his new car.

God made Coke God made Pepsi God made me, Oh so sexy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Which disney princess always stays old? Snow White

Knock Knock Who's there? Sally Sally who? Haha I'm just kidding, I'm Jorge.

What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers and the middle one is for u

Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

Why didn't the blonde finish her book? She died.

Why did the little boy fall of his bike? He was dead.