A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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Knock Knock Who's There? Betty Betty Who Betty Sue Never heard of ya I'm here from the management. You have a present. I don't care, we don't take kindly to you city folks. But Sir, If you don't take this I will have to ask you to leave. Well what is it. It's your bill. Knock knock Who's there? Cowabunga! Cowabunga Who? Moo Moo alalalalalal woohoo i'm so high

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm homosexual And so is my boyfriend Jeremy, with whom I have shared countless evenings of joy and laughter.

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

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Three black men walk into a bar. One of the men, having recently reached sobriety, opts not to commence in the consumption of alcohol. The other two, impressed by his level of restraint, decide to leave the bar and take the initiative to turn their lives around for the better.

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What is black and likely to fail? A chain smokers lungs.

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Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

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Billy: Hey hey hey!!!!! wanna hear a dirty joke? Joe: Sure Billy: A pig fell in the mud

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What do you call a KKK member? ...racist

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what do you get when a penguin has a heart atack pengatack

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

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What eats grass and goes MMMMOOOOOOO? A weird person that likes to eat grass and MMMMOOOOOOO

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Knock knock.

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How do you save a drowning Asian teenage boy? You get him out of the water.

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Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

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How can you tell a baby lost it's voice? It doesn't scream when you staple it to a ceiling fan and turn it on.

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What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I believe you've seen enough of these already.

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What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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Get on the boat.

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Did you hear the one about the guy who couldnt find his shoes? No? ok ill talk to someone who will get the reference

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Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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