These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

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Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

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Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

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On a tusday night, three guys walk into a bar After realising they have to work they proceed to exit

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I hi Jacked your car And killed your family

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What happened to the guy that got shot? He fell down

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What's two plus two? Window

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was staples to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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Title IX

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BIG MAC'S

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What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you? Someone else's cheese.

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What's black and self-describing? The words of this joke.

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whats short blonde and speaks spanish? my spanish teacher Mrs. Inman

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you suck

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knock knock who's there? penis in penis in who? penis in you

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the tree fall over? The koala forgot to let go.

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wow i bet grass is lucky on st patricks day. why? becuase its green all year. *smacks* ow. i kno. but hey im corn.

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Why couldnt the pirate get into the movies? Because it was rated pg-13 and his parents didnr likw him watching that

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what is the difference between the number 2 and the number 5 3

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What do an asian, a black man, and a Mexican all have in common? They all belong minorites that at one time have been outcast by society

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Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops