Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

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Bride: "He went to Jared's!!! Ex: "But every Kiss Begins with Kay...."

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? He got many things, because everyone felt bad for him. Someone even brought him into their house so he could have Christmas dinner. On Christmas Day someone gave him fifty dollars to spend on food for his family. Only thing is, he didn't have a family.

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Question: You are in a bed between a hot chick and a gay guy, who do you turn your back to? Answer: False, I am to unattractive to find myself in bed with anybody else.

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What's a fun place to visit on the weekend? Uranus.

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What Do You Call A Black Guy Surrounded By Nine White Guys With Bats? Jackie Robinson.

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What happens when you drop a glass of milk? It hits the ground and breaks, depending on what material the glass is made of, acrylic glass or plastic, and the softness of the floor you drop it on,

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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whats red and smells like cherries red cherries

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because 7, 8, 9

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Michael Brown

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Why did the little boy leave his bike on the side of the road? He was kidnapped and his body was found 2 weeks later at Penn State

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Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

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Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

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My computer will die soon, and my life is a lie. Refrigerator.

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Did you hear about the man with the bicycle? He was 2 tired.

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What did the woman say to the man before she had sex with him? "May I have sex with you, please?"

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a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

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Yo mom is so stinky that when she gets in a room every one leaves the room

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Food and blankets from a nearby shelter.

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What's black and runs fast? Newsflash: Most of you are racist.

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The dewey decimal system

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What is big, grey, has 8 wheels, can fly, swim and walk. I dunno. Thats why I'm asking

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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