i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

Why does a new mother have big jugs? Her baby died of Sudden infant death syndrome.

Q:How come we have a black man in th white house? A: because we elected him

Good afternoon.

Whats invisable and smells like a apple? An invisable apple

Knock Knock Who's there? Jeff Oh hey Jeff, come on in

What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

Gretta has five legs? -no

Whats similar between an apple and a black guy there is no similarities between them

Justin Beiber is a good singer

Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

How does a black woman know she is pregnant? When she pulls her tampon out the cotton is already picked.

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

two japanese men walk into a bar. the first japanese man says “i am japanese!” the second japanese man says “i am also japanese!” the bartender then says “well, hey. i’m japanese too”. the bar was in japan.

roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

whats green and slimy? green slim

Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

Jack Stevens

You know what's gay? Grabbing another man's penis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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