What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

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What is the loneliest number to exist? Zero. Except it's not lonely. I'm just saying there are zero lonely numbers. Numbers aren't sentient. They can't feel loneliness.

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Don't you hate the retarded smart people who think anti-jokes are all about really explaining but adding sarcasm? Yes.

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"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

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FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

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Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

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This is a joke for Homeless people:

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 rapes people

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You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

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a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

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What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

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You're on fire.

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A jew goes to a bar,then wakes up with presents under his candels.

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Q: What does DNA stand for? A: National Dyslexic Association

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A guy vociferiously kills another person- fueled by the incentive of personal gain provided by his rapacious, human nature. He is an army soldier who's triumphant in battle and hoping to recieve a promotion. However, ultimately all he did was essentially insignificantt and his acts of purported valor were diametrically unnoticed by all except for his closest friends/allies. He never did supass his original self of a soldier and died of a natural cause that was disclosed only to the members of his immediate family.

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How do you know that your at a gay barbecue? Because, the hot dogs taste like shit!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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