Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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why did the cow go to the theater? to see the new movies pick one and have a good time.

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how do you get 20 people in a mini? open the door would be a good start but i dont think they will all fit.

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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Why did the Hindu eat the Mongolian? He tried, the Mongolian raped him.

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A religion is like a penis. They are both nouns.

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Im gay What about you

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What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

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Whats the difference between a person with cancer and breakfast? Breakfast is important

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Why is my girlfriend pregnant? We wanted an abortion

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

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Why did the Football Coach go to the Bank?? To Cash his Paycheck.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

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So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

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An irishman walks into a bar and stays there until he goes home.

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That awkward moment where all you want for Christmas is for your parents to get back together but then you realize that they died in a car crash

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wael.. nuff said

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What did the girl say when she was getting raped? "Stop, you're hurting me."

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How did the plumber fix the leaky faucet? Trick question. The plumber is actually an iguana.

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The awkward when you didn't actually say moment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops