A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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what do you call a seagull that flies over the bay? -a seagull

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Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga? one of them is a women the other one is not.

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Orange. Don't be ridiculous. Oranges can't talk.

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If a red house has red bricks, and a yellow house has yellow bricks, what colour of bricks does a greenhouse have? Greenhouses are made of glass.

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Rozes r read Vilets r blew iy cahn noht spell becuase i am blind.

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What do we want? Equal rights for people with Tourette's Syndrome. When do we want them? Fuck!

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What's so funny about losing the game? Nothing.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

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What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

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Why are birds purple? because it fits the sky why are bats purple? bats aren't purple

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What do you call 1000 black men walking down a street? The million man march

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How do you get a black man down from a tree? Cut the rope!

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Do you know what has always angered me about people not choosing to control their own lives Nero?

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24

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I like to rape children, then kill them, eat them and defecate them into a toilet

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Why did the boy drop his vannlai ice cream?because Vannlia ice came.

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A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

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How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your worm... I mean, a worm in your apple ? "Then I took an arrow to the knee" jokes.

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What do you call a woman who has huge breasts? Sarah, for instance.

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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